There is one thing good about me that I know for sure - I can empathize. Yes I am being immodest, and I am not ashamed. In my 27 years of life, I have learnt that if people in this world have an iota more of empathy, there will be more peace around. And I am not talking about empathy with the poor and needy. No, I am talking about things much less significant, but which can have a gargantuan impact on our lives.
No, empathy is not about saying "I understand", its about understanding, and sometimes about saying "I know I can't understand, but I will try". There is a diference. Empathy is never negative. So, for instance, your best friend hasn't called you for three months and you think "She doesn't want to speak to me, she has changed". This is not empathy, its just the opposite infact:)
When you empathize, you don't judge people; you put yourself in their shoes. You don't have preconceived notions, you don't jump to conclusions without knowing the truth, and in the process, you hurt yourself a little less, because you know the other person did not intend to hurt you. Its very basic - nothing complicated. However, on most occasions, people have unbending beliefs that they prefer to stick to, unaware of the fact that life does not hold the same meaning for every individual. What you see as red, might not be red for someone else. What works for you, might not work for someone else. What the other person has gone through, you might never experience in your entire life, unless, you empathize.
Empathize with people you know- it precludes misunderstandings. Empathize with strangers, you will evolve as a human being when you are able to understand their needs, feel it the way they do. Before you have any unconstructive thought, spare a moment to think - "Are there any other possibilities?" In most cases, there will be.
No, empathy is not about saying "I understand", its about understanding, and sometimes about saying "I know I can't understand, but I will try". There is a diference. Empathy is never negative. So, for instance, your best friend hasn't called you for three months and you think "She doesn't want to speak to me, she has changed". This is not empathy, its just the opposite infact:)
When you empathize, you don't judge people; you put yourself in their shoes. You don't have preconceived notions, you don't jump to conclusions without knowing the truth, and in the process, you hurt yourself a little less, because you know the other person did not intend to hurt you. Its very basic - nothing complicated. However, on most occasions, people have unbending beliefs that they prefer to stick to, unaware of the fact that life does not hold the same meaning for every individual. What you see as red, might not be red for someone else. What works for you, might not work for someone else. What the other person has gone through, you might never experience in your entire life, unless, you empathize.
Empathize with people you know- it precludes misunderstandings. Empathize with strangers, you will evolve as a human being when you are able to understand their needs, feel it the way they do. Before you have any unconstructive thought, spare a moment to think - "Are there any other possibilities?" In most cases, there will be.
Its not very difficult, is it?
2 comments:
Yeah, i try to empathize! Some great lines thr.
I understand.
I really do.
When you have all the time in the world and nothing else to do, you could try reading this - http://braveheart-blog.blogspot.com/2007/10/notes-from-konkan-coastal-bike-safari.html
You might strike a chord!
-- Akshaya
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